And no, driving in the car to pick up a child doesn’t count.
As a mom with three kids, I know I have a hard time claiming time for myself. The one thing I schedule for myself every day possible is running. I have made it a point from when the kids were babies to take this time for myself - even if it’s just a half hour or 20 minutes - to clear my head and get outside whenever possible. I live in western New York - snow country - but I promised myself a few years ago I would get outside unless the conditions were truly dangerous - ie, freezing rain or temperatures below 20 degrees.
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When I was home with all three kids (all under 4 years old at one point), I would literally get claustrophobic and desperate for just a breath of fresh air. I felt like I had kids touching me and I was carrying babies all day, and I needed a brief escape (now that they are all in school, of course I am sometimes sorry those days are over!). Running takes care of that. By allowing myself to indulge in this short amount of time each day, I am able to remain calm with my kids and on a much more even keel in general.
I have a friend who used to set her alarm for 5:30 am each day so she could read for pleasure for one hour before the family was up and running. I have another friend who gardens - even if it’s just pulling a few weeds. Growing up, I can remember my mom doing yoga stretches every night in her room at 9 o’clock; no one was to bother her during this time.
How do you make time for yourself or what would you do with this time if you managed to find it?
09.29.08 @ 12:47 pm
Time for me???? I too am in the position of being home with three kids under 4. It’s an adventure.
I have to admit the only time I take for me is after the kids go to bed. I know all the diets say to stop eating three hours before bed, but I relish in my two scoops of light ice cream an a little tv time. It’s probably the only thing I eat sitting down without sharing all day. Maybe that’s why the pounds aren’t melting off!
find your gold star at goldstarmoms.blogspot.com
09.29.08 @ 3:25 pm
I leave my husband in charge of our three kids while I go into the bathroom and lock the door. I usually go tinkle and I read one magazine article from Reader’s Digest. This may only take a few minutes, but it is a luxury for me to read one article, from beginning to end, without ANY interuptions!
09.29.08 @ 5:47 pm
Hi Rachel, I am on my second generation of kids! People always ask me how old I am. This is my second generation of children!! I am a single parent for about ten years now and would love to retire!, not gonna happen. I have raised great kids, however, I realize that I have gotten lost in the shuffle, people allways ask ? How old are you? Wouldn’t they like to know. Love your show and you. Can I get a break?
09.29.08 @ 10:58 pm
I am younger i am 22 with a 3 yr old and a 4 month old! i am lucky my mom takes the girls every saturday night. I either make it a date night with hubby or i make a date with one of my girl friends
09.30.08 @ 10:02 am
I love to get together with a couple of friends for sushi and scrapbooking! We try to make a G.N.O. (girls’ night out) as often as possible, but it usually only ends up being about once a month with everyone’s sports practices and other extracurricular activities. It’s so nice to just sit down, eat, have someone serve ME and talk girl stuff! Then, we go to someone’s house or a scrapbook store and get busy being creative preserving memories of our family. (Sometimes, instead of sushi, we’ll just get together at my house for appetizers, drinks, desserts, and then scrapbooking.) Good times!
09.30.08 @ 11:53 am
I can’t find the time for myself…I have two kids - 2 & 1 - a husband, dog and new house. I am up at 4:30am and out the door by 4:45am for a one hour drive to work. My husband takes the kids to daycare. I work until 4pm then drive one hour to pick up my kids from daycare then another half hour from daycare to home. I get home around 6 depending on traffic. Unload the car, figure out what to have for dinner, make it and eat by 7. Then I spend the next hour getting the girls ready for bed, doing laundry, dishes from dinner and trying to make sense of other daily household tasks. My 2 yr old is in bed by 8 and hopefully falls asleep by 9. I get myself ready for bed, finish laundry and get things around for the next day - clothes, lunch, items for daycare. The first time I put my 1 yr old to bed is 10pm but she only sleeps 45 minutes then is up for 3-4 hours all night long….my alarm goes off at 4:30 and my hectic schedule starts all over again.
I have to take a day off of work - unpaid - in order to get a day to myself but even that is usually spent doing laundry, dishes, cleaning the house or on a really lucky day off I get to sleep for two hours to try and recharge myself.
09.30.08 @ 12:41 pm
I go to the gym. I figure my kids would appreciate having a hot mom (or atleast TRYING to):)
09.30.08 @ 8:20 pm
I go to the gym, the ymca has free 1 1/2 hours of babysitting a day and I take my 15 month old. He gets to socialize with other kids and I know exercise will make me healthier to keep up with him for a long time.
10.01.08 @ 8:22 am
If your a parent finding a free minute anywhere is a GOd Send. I am owner of an
in home Family Daycare a nd ahve two boys of my own 19 and 13. I also managed to somehow inherit their friends. My daycare is filled w 6 lively pre k toddlers ranging in age from 12 months to 3. My day is almost always fille d w a houseful but let me tell you how important it is to find a few minutes to yourself. It will make you a better parent friend and spouse and a role model to your child to see that you are a priority and you feel valued. As a mom, we feel guilty about taking 5 minutes but it is soo important. I love to read and so I get up at the crack of day and slip in a coffee or latte w a quick read. Generally one of those 2 minute stories w a verse to inspire me. In the evenings I try to sneak out for you guessed it … more coffee lol Trust me ladies those lil moments make you a great person to everyone and you DO DESERVE IT!
10.01.08 @ 9:41 am
im 40 and have twin 3 year old boy and girl i have no time what so ever for myself.i dont work because it would cost me more money for them to go into daycare.if it all works out, once a week i get 1 hour to go to weight watchers.i guess i should try to get up before the family does to have time for myself
10.01.08 @ 11:34 am
I love to walk so I take off to a Metro Park and hike for leisure. If I can’t hike alone then I bring along the family and I still find it to be a peaceful time. I really feel recharged and my son laughs when I say I feel like I have stepped into a nature calendar! I want to learn how to cross country ski since we have trails for that as well (and also ice rinks) so I can get back to nature all year round.
10.01.08 @ 12:27 pm
I am the mother of 3 boys…17..15…and 5. They are all involved in sports and other activities, so we always seem to be running somewhere. I’m not quite as busy as I was 12 years ago…but I do miss those busy times. It seems like they grow so quickly and then they don’t need you as much as they use to. My “me” time would have to include SHOPPING. There is nothing like a weekend shopping trip to pick you up and refuel you for awhile. These trips don’t happen often, but when they do I have a blast.
10.01.08 @ 10:22 pm
I meditate for a few minutes a day. I just close my eyes, give thanks for all the blessings I’ve received and pray for my intentions.
10.01.08 @ 11:45 pm
I am the single parent of 7 children. Their ages range from 2 yrs old to 13 yrs old. Four of my kids are mine from their birth and three are my nephews that I have had for three years now. I haven’t always had this many kids so i have tried my best to find ways to take a mom time out. So I try to spend time by myself when the 2 yr old takes a nap. My 3 yr old doesn’t take a nap so he is required to do quiet time in his room for at least a half and hour. If that fells we will take a walk for awhile so I can at least get some fresh air and time to clear my head. They are usually quiet on our walks so they can be peaceful. Oh we do this while the other 5 are at school.
10.03.08 @ 10:41 am
I have 3 boys, 12, 9, &5, and one girl, 3 1/2 yrs. Right now the smaller 2 are at home and the 2 oldest are in school. Between all 4 playing soccer,(I’m an assistant coach for smaller 2), the smaller 2 in gymnastics, along with the older 2 in scouts and piano among one in chorus and one in Academic Bowl, plus church activities, I have honestly zero time for me. My husband doesn’t normally get home until 7:30p.m. or later and by the time we manage to let them get their homework done and music practiced- oh, did I mention my oldest one was in band?, then there’s no “me” time! I’m not like most- I take my kids everywhere I go whether it’s to the dentist, doctor, or wherever. I don’t have an oncall babysitter so my days are hectic. I do know they’ll be grown one day in the near future and I will look back and ponder on how I did it. I do have the philosophy that I had my kids to raise myself, not others to raise them. I know it’s tough right now, but we’ll get through it and be glad we did.
10.03.08 @ 10:50 am
I get up at 5am and work out at the gym while the rest of the family is still sleeping. It gives me some alone time and gets me energized for the day.
10.03.08 @ 7:50 pm
I try too take 15 minutes to a hour just to cuddle with a book if my girls are in home. My girls ages are 13 and 16 and my 16 year old has a disabilty so that is alot of hard work too with her but I work out at curves too so i have some time with the women there and my husband and I tryed too find some time for us after we run the kids all over the place
10.03.08 @ 8:44 pm
Hello all you fantastic moms!
I am a 27 year old mom of two little girls. I work full time, go to school full time, and I am president of the PTA. My kids are in soccer and ballet so my husband helps me out with their activities. Having personal time is vital for my sanity! I am very active and cycle a few times per week plus each weekend our family gets outside and rock climbs or hikes. I also try to get in an accupuncture or spa session or a yoga class every few weeks with a girlfriend. It is definately a challenge to find time for me, but it is well worth it. The best system I found is to schedule time for me in my planner every week so that I don’t automatically commit to every “favor” or “need” from every person I encounter. I used to overlook my own needs to help out others but I find that I am worth it to give myself time to take care of my body and mind when I can. We (as moms) need to care for ourselves so that we can care for others.
10.04.08 @ 6:15 am
We have 4 kids, 5, 7, 9, 11, yes, this is the odd year. When they were all 6 and younger at one time and I was home I would go to the YMCA more for my sanity than exercise, that 1 1/2 hours of child care was wonderful for me and the kids. Now they are in school and I work fulltime so in between soccer (4 play and I coach), 2 in dance, 4 in Scouts (oh I’m the Brownie Leader too) and our middleschooler’s various clubs and carpools I have found 2 times a day to sneak in Mom time, an early morning run or reading before bed. A bunch of us Mom’s also formed a book club, guaranteeing we get out of the house at least once a month for Mom time, sometimes we even have lengthy discussions about the book.
10.05.08 @ 7:09 pm
Do you support the acai berry like the site states you do? Can you tell me if you have tried it? What do you think?
10.05.08 @ 7:50 pm
Hi
I was in the same boat as many that have gone by with three small kids and didnt work it was alot to be with them 24/7 but then one by one they started school…you gonna miss those days when they are young. They are now
11 and 9 girls and 13yr old son. With two in middle school,elem and fulltime job and then add a husband its even more harder (i’m the only one whos allowed to drive) one daugther has track and youngest in band and my son in afterschool program…When I want to get away from them all I try and leave over to my moms alone or take a hot bath with no bothers but my mom also takes them every other weekend whens shes off work and sometimes just for the night.So Im lucky she is there to help in such a way.I’m a only child with three kids lol so she treasures us all,even my husband lol
10.05.08 @ 9:01 pm
I have 2 children - My days are crazy from 6am - 9pm (my 4 year olds bed time). I make it a point to go out with my girlfriends at least once a month. We go to dinner and a play or just hang out. I do feel guilty for leaving, but know i need it to recharge and it makes me a happier person
10.07.08 @ 9:04 am
I am the mother of 3 also,27,18 & 15. I am suffering from “empty nest”. Just about all the games and practices are over..What now…
Its difficult to take a look around. There are still things to do around. So now its time
for the massage and pedicure. Exercise and lunches with all those girl scout leaders….
Take time now…Dont wait.